Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
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