my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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