I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
