I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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