I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize