do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
