what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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