the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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