woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
