scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
