butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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