When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
