Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
