On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
