whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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