also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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