First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Randomize
