he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
