i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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