He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
