You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
