I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
