No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
