We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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