What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
