I murdered the dance floor call the cops
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
