The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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