Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
