I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize