on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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