He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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