I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
MIDGETS
????
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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