guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
