another moral hangover. fuck.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
