Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
