Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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