I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
