yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
one might say we're banned from that church
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
