I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
