doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
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you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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