addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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