Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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