If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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