i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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