He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
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