I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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