The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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