Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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