fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize