god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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