i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Verdict: uncircumcised.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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